Erich and I got into an argument this afternoon. It started as a silly game. I was dancing around the room creating an imaginary scenario where I challenged our neighbor to an actual duel for no good reason.
I would shout, “Ho, there Mitch90 (we call him that because of his license plates )! I have changed my mind about you parking in our yard. I find I can no longer tolerate it and it offends my senses! I challenge you to a duel to the death!”
Erich told me I was being absurd and there was no way to justify such a challenge. Thus I began to try to justify it…
What if the guns I provided for the duel were fakes?
Erich said that still wouldn’t justify it because the reason for dueling was unreasonable to begin with. To which I replied, But yes, wouldn’t it have been foolish for Mitch90 to agree to such terms? Thus, by making the whole thing a prank I would be teaching him a valuable lesson. Is that not a good reason for challenging him to a ridiculous duel?
As we both went back and forth we started to get more and more personal. Then, the conversation suddenly turned from silly game to actual argument.
Within the period of the argument both made some pretty good points, and we also each took a few unnecessary jabs below the belt. Ultimately, we came to a reasonable conclusion. A little give and take that allowed us to grease the wheels of our marriage and keep things moving lovingly and efficiently.
In a way I think this kind of arguing is vital to a healthy marriage. We push each other to be better versions of ourselves. In a way I am his muse and he is mine.
After the argument I felt a sudden wave of inspiration . I would like to attempt to share the bits of information I was able to cling to after the wave subsided…
Don’t be afraid to feel like a hypocrite sometimes.Learn to embrace duality within yourself. Love the elements of yourself that you deem most unworthy, because those, too, can help define you!
God is infallible. There are no mistakes in the Universe. Everything that comes into existence, every object, thought and feeling has meaning and value. Even the forces that seem at odds have purpose and give meaning to one another. The light means nothing without the darkness. Without evil we do not know what is good. All duality is an illusion.
The Truth of the Universe is too absurd and profound for my rational mind to fully comprehend. Before I can embrace the duality of the Universe, I must learn to unite the dualities within myself. I must crawl before I can walk. I must accept and understand my true Self before I can fully accept and understand the nature of God.
The lessons of Strength and Temperance can assist me in finding peace between my judgment and reason and my passion and appetite.
Both images suggest the need for gentleness and warn against allowing either reason or passion to overwhelm the other. Sometimes it feels like there is a battle happening within, and today I got to see that inner battle play out as an argument with my husband. Thankfully Erich was willing to talk about our differences so that I was able to see that my passions sometimes run away with me.
I’ll leave you with the words of Kahlil Gibran, who has a way with conveying message far more artistically than I.Please consider his message mindfully and honor your reaction to them.
On Reason and Passion
Your soul is oftentimes a battlefield, upon which your reason and your judgment wage war against your passion and your appetite.
Would that I could be the peacemaker in your soul, that I might turn the discord and the rivalry of your elements into oneness and melody.
But how shall I, unless you yourselves be also the peacemakers, nay, the lovers of all your elements?
Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas.
For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction.
Therefore let your soul exalt your reason to the height of passion, that it may sing;
And let it direct your passion with reason, that your passion may live through its own daily resurrection, and like the phoenix rise above its own ashes.
I would have you consider your judgment and your appetite even as you would two loved guests in your house.
Surely you would not honour one guest above the other; for he who is more mindful of one loses the love and the faith of both.
Among the hills, when you sit in the cool shade of the white poplars, sharing the peace and serenity of distant fields and meadows — then let your heart say in silence, “God rests in reason.”
And when the storm comes, and the mighty wind shakes the forest, and thunder and lightning proclaim the majesty of the sky — then let your heart say in awe, “God moves in passion.”
And since you are a breath in God’s sphere, and a leaf in God’s forest, you too should rest in reason and move in passion.